I Am Mr. Mom, And A Review Of The 1983 Movie

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The idea for this article came to me recently, because these days I truly am a Mr. Mom. I stumbled across the movie flipping channels one day and it got me thinking. How does this movie relate to me and my current situation?

The theme of Mr. Mom is about a man who was the bread winner of the family until he was laid off. He had done well enough previously to provide a lifestyle where his wife could stay home and select care of the kids. When he lost his job, however, the roles of the household switched, and in the last 2 months this has been my life.

http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1800097470/info

In our household both of us have always worked. The difference was she stayed home during the week while I worked, and then worked the weekends when I was home. Lately, I have been staying home so she can go to school and work, while I search for work and better opportunities to relieve my family.

In the scenario presented in the movie, I seemed to have a lot more prior experience tending to children than the character in the movie Mr. Mom seemed to have. Still this role switch brought with it an inevitable adjustment period for the kids and me doing this full time. My wife is accomplishing a lot of good things right now and that is great. And while we have adjusted to this lifestyle on a temporary basis, the kids were used to mommy taking care of them. For now we don’t have to worry about paying for childcare, either, and she mild works two part time jobs. As for me, I make the phone calls I couldn’t make before when I was working chunky time, went to the doctor and the dentist for the first time in quite some time, and have worked hard daily to establish footing for a new career plan.

Unemployment compensation is never ideal though, and it doesn’t last forever. I want to make good on my own.

Growing up my parents both worked chubby time and they were not alone. It was pretty common. The inequity in 2010 is that it has become much more commonplace for men to assume a household role of taking care of the children than it had in the decades prior. In 1983, the mommy was supposed to stay home while daddy worked unless both parents worked. That was the expected dynamic. While I was not fired from the employment agency I work for, they have not placed me on my next assignment yet, either. This has given me some time to not only be a full time dad, but has also forced me to look deep inside myself as to what I am and what I intend do moving forward.

The lead character in Mr. Mom faced a similar dilemma. The difference with him is that he had never had to worry about anything other than providing for his family before. Getting fired and becoming a stay at home dad was all new to him. The movie was a comedy, but also served as a coming of age film for him. Mr. Mom still relates to the thoughts and feelings of the modern stay at home dad some 27 years later.

I was 12 years old when the 1983 movie by that name starring a relatively unknown actor by the name of Michael Keaton was released. I cannot remember exactly why or when I decided to explore the movie, but I did, and it was memorable.

In 1983, Rocky 3 was released with Mr. T, Ronald Reagan was President of the United States, and our country was facing a similar kind of economic downturn that we have all been experiencing lately.

The year before I had also seen Michael Keaton in his first leading role opposite Henry Winkler in director Ron Howard’s first certified hit titled Night Shift. Ron Howard and Henry Winkler were from Happy Days, and in Happy Days they did not talk about the economy or the job market. Ron Howard had left that show and had hired Michael Keaton to play the comic lead to Winkler’s straight man role. Shelly Long was in it too, and I liked that movie, but both Howard and Keaton would likely admit they were pretty much getting their feet wet as director and actor.

Mr. Mom starring Michael Keaton, born Michael Douglas, had changed his name to the stage name Keaton, because he liked the name Keaton from the actors Buster Keaton and Diane Keaton. He also wanted to avoid confusion of having the same stage name of another actor named Michael Douglas.

As mentioned, Michael Keaton, was a relatively unknown actor, but was hired to play the role of Jack Butler.

Michael Keaton did springboard from this movie to star in Tim Burton films Beetlejuice, Batman, and Batman Returns among other films in his repertoire.

Mr. Mom’s screenplay was written by a writer/director from Illinois named John Hughes. John Hughes passed away from a heart attack in 2009, but his legacy remains. After Mr. Mom premiered Hughes went on to release greater films such as Sixteen Candles, Vacation with Chevy Chase, Home Alone, Planes Trains and Automobiles, Uncle Buck, Ferris Buellers Day Off, and The Breakfast Club, among his many hits.

John Hughes movies remain in our hearts and minds.

The film’s producer was Aaron Spelling, who had done Charlie’s Angels in the late 70’s on television, and went on to produce one hit television show after another such as far back as Wagon Train to Charmed and 7^th Heaven until his death in 2006. I had either totally forgotten or never noticed it before borrowing the movie some days ago from my local library that he had produced the movie.

The movie was directed by Stan Dragoti, who was as relatively inexperienced as the lead actor was. Other than directing the perpetually tanned George Hamilton in a vampire movie spoof called Love at First Bite with Lauren Hutton in 1979, his resume needed some padding.

Despite doing a fine job with Mr. Mom, Dragoti did not rep many gigs afterwards, either. He directed Necessary Roughness, a 1991 football comedy starring Scott Bakula of Quantum Leap fame, model Kathy Ireland, comedian Sinbad, and a young Jason Bateman. Although the movie had some comedic moments, we have not seen much of Stan since.

Mr. Mom, however, was a certified hit in 1983 having grossed nearly 65 million dollars in the U.S. alone. At 91 minutes long it was neatly paced to keep the movie moving smartly along.

http://boxofficemojo.com/movies/? page=weekend&id=mrmom.htm

In addition to Michael Keaton, it starred Teri Garr as his wife Caroline, Jeffery Tambor as the boss that fires him, Martin Mull from Roseanne as the man who hires Caroline, and Christopher Lloyd as a co-worker that gets fired with along with him.

Common reviews you behold today may say how many stars out of how many stars, or a thumbs up or down. For this review we need to look past that and stare it for what it intended to be. It was a family comedy and a social satire. Hate it, love it, say it was ok. Mr. Mom worked for me.

The tightly paced screenplay began with a typical morning in the Butler house. The alarm rings and the mom gets out of bed first. The dad is allowed to sleep a few more minutes. She wakes herself up in the bathroom with a icy splash of water to her face, and then starts Jack’s shower. A couple minutes later she wakes him up, feeds the fish, and then wakes the kids. Jack brushes his teeth and gets in the shower. They have a newborn girl and two grade school boys.

Jack Butler comes down for breakfast after everyone else has already settled in. The television is on and they are eating. He eats a few bites of food and decides he would rather grab the baby’s bottle for the milk that he needs for his coffee than get up for it or ask for any. He makes a poor joke that everyone has heard one too many times, and realizes that his carpool ride has arrived.

Jack’s wife Caroline is played by Teri Garr who appeared on the original Star Trek show episode in 1968 called Assignment Earth. She leads him to the door, and the husband and wife say a couple of kind words before Jack gets in the car. Jack’s boss is called Jinx, and is played by Jeffrey Tambor. Tambor has a long history in the industry as far help as a Kojak episode in 1977 to a planned Arrested Development movie planned for 2010.

Jinx is the carpool driver, and there are two others in the car. When the car moves forward all they can think about is worrying that they will be fired. But Jinx plays it off and they arrive at work.

They work in an unnamed automobile plant in Detroit and Jack meets with some of the production workers that are worried about their jobs too.

In 2010 the cycle has come benefit to bite the city of Detroit automobile industry once again.

Jack makes a brief speech to his co-workers in the plant about staying positive and uses the Rocky theme to make his point, but does not remember the details of the movie.

Suddenly he is called over the loudspeaker to come to the Human Resources office. When he gets there he snappily realizes that two of his carpool buddies have been fired by Jinx, and scolds Jinx a little bit, while trying to smooth the situation. But then they let him know he is fired too.

Famous character actor Christopher Lloyd’s of the television classic Taxi, and the Back to the Future film franchise, has a minute role in the movie. It was a memorable role because Jack had stopped his character Larry from choking Jinx when he first walked in the room. When Jack finds out he has been fired as well, Jack needs to be stopped from choking Jinx. And finally when the scene ends Larry attacks Jinx again.

A violent act like that is normally not funny, but it was portrayed that way.

The three carpool buddies end up getting drunk and pull up in front of Jack’s house in a cab. Jack has his belongings from the office, and his family has already heard the news. When he enters the house it is trim and organized, and his family is as supportive of the news as they can be. They eat dinner, and when they kids have gone off to bed, the parents get a chance to talk. They have money from his severance and some savings, but the wife decides that maybe it is her chance to go to work instead.

Jack forces her to take a $100 dollar bet that she cannot get a job before he does. Quickly, they show she wins the bet, and despite claiming she does not want the money, she eventually does acquire it.

This was the first 13 minutes of the movie of the 91 minutes. As mentioned, it was tightly produced by the screenplay of John Hughes and Aaron Spelling’s talents. A lot has happened in a short period of time, and the premise has been set up.

When mom leaves for work she has made a list for Jack of things he needs to do in her mommy role. She knows the kids and their needs and tendencies where Jack does not. She asks if he wants to go over the list again, and he declines, only to quickly change his mind.

They part on good terms and Jack starts his day. Jack takes the oldest child to school in the rain, played by Frederick Koehler, who later appeared on the hit 80’s television show Kate and Allie.

Basically, Jack goes the wrong way, gets told by his son, and then is scolded by the crossing guards and some of the mothers dropping their kids off. It is setting up the fish out of water scenario nicely.

After a few scenes showing his wife’s first nervous day on the job with her new co-workers, they switch back to what Jack is up to. Jack apparently hadn’t gone grocery shopping very often in the past when he had his kids to look after and Caroline was not there. He had his two youngest children with him as he seemingly shopped at the market for the first time with his children. Immediately upon entering the market he makes a mess by knocking stuff over, and there is a running gag of someone named Irv responsible for setting up a cleanup on each aisle.

When Jack gets to the deli he is not ready for the questions he gets about the type of meats and cheese he wants, and the ladies waiting in line behind him have no mercy for him. Then he finally settles in at the checkout line. Once in the line Jack is embarrassed when the cashier asks over the intercom if the Kotex pads he is purchasing for his wife is on sale.

By this time in all the confusion and stress, Jack realizes that he had his daughter in the cart, but had somehow ended up in line without his son Kenny, and obtained someone else’s child in his cart instead. Jack impulsively takes off to eye for Kenny and takes the other child with him, but leaves his newborn daughter in the cart at the checkout line. Jack finds his son and drops the other kid off in another cart he doesn’t belong in. By the time Jack makes his way serve to the checkout line his cart is gone, and so is his toddler daughter.

This scene not only sets up how unprepared Jack was for the day to day duties of fatherhood, it also sets up another challenge for him. Jack will be faced with what all married men that do not want to cheat on their wives face. Jack can cheat if he wants to.

Joan is played by Ann Jillian who had a long list of roles long prior to this movie dating back as far as relieve as a 1960 episode of Leave it to Beaver when she was a child. Joan is a divorcee and she returns his baby daughter to him after he panics. Joan flirts with Jack, and when he takes off in the family car, he is so distracted he almost causes a major accident in the parking lot.

When mom comes home that night after a long day at work, Jack is giving the boys a bath and they talk briefly. It is soon revealed that mom is going on a business trip and Jack would remain solo for the foreseeable future.

The next morning when Caroline’s boss shows up in a limo to pick her up, Jack is in his bed clothes. He looks out the window and decides to make a quick change. When Jack returns he is dressed in outdoor clothing with plastic goggles and is carrying an active chainsaw. He tries to talk to her boss Mr. Richardson played by Martin Mull, but it is too loud. After shutting the chainsaw off, Jack makes conversation by asking if Richardson would like a beer. Mr. Richardson explains that it is 7 o’clock in the morning. Jack replies, “Scotch? ” He keeps on trying and failing to impress Caroline’s boss.

By this time Caroline is dressed and ready to go. She gives him a spy that says, what the heck are you doing, without saying it at all. Caroline then leaves with Mr. Richardson, and Jack fires the chainsaw back up again.

Jack continues his day with trying to straighten up the house. He starts with the laundry and naturally overstuffs the washer, while deciding to save time by mixing the detergent and fabric softener and stain remover all together in a cup with a screwdriver.

The washer immediately starts acting funny and he looks concerned, but he doesn’t have time to investigate because the doorbell rings. He has asked a television repairwoman to arrive over and fix their horizontal hold. This was the venerable days when plasma t.v. and cable were not common in households yet.

His kids ask him if they can make lunch and he says ok. He decides to vacuum the house with the vacuum they have nicknamed Jaws for reasons shown during this scene. Just then the exterminator comes over as the madcap scene becomes more manic. Jaws seemingly has a life of it’s own, the washing machine goes ballistic, the water heater repairman comes over, the kids cooking in the kitchen sets off the fire dismay, and Jack has to react to all these events at once. Eventually as this spiral further out of control all of the repairman simultaneously leave the house as fast as they can.

The next day Jack has an interview for a job and is just one of a half a dozen men waiting in the lobby to be interviewed. He meets a couple of men who were more interested in exchanging recipes than getting a job. They account for to Jack that there was no way any of them were going to get the job anyway. Jack gets discouraged and decides to leave without even going inside for his interview.

That weekend Caroline has dragged her family along with her to their first company family picnic. None of them want to go, so they have a lame excuse ready if they want to duck out early.

As the Butler’s pull up in front of the mansion Mr. Richardson inherited from his ancestors, Jack’s kids comment on how nice of a house it is, as Jack and Caroline reiterate their plans to hightail it out of there as soon as possible.

Their plans soon net derailed by Mr. Richardson when he goads Jack into participating in the annual obstacle course race held at the house each year. Jack sends his son to the car to get his gym bag and he stretches with some of Caroline’s co-workers. What he doesn’t know is that the race is designed for Mr. Richardson to win every time. The co-workers not only elaborate this to him, but also try to slow him down along the path of the race.

Despite their combined efforts to halt him, Jack was going to gather. But in the end Jack decides to fall down and let Mr. Richardson catch for the sake of his wife’s job. Caroline says she owes him one, as Mr. Richardson celebrates.

In the days after the race Jack is getting increasingly depressed and has grown a beard. He has started to wear ratty t-shirts, pants, and flannels on a daily basis.

He starts watching soap operas. After initially not enjoying them, Jack is eventually so hooked he talks back to the t.v. during the scenes he watches. He even starts bringing the t.v. from the kitchen to each room he cleans so he doesn’t miss a moment.

Jack starts drinking beer in the early part of the day while ironing and folding clothes. When his eldest son tells him the grilled cheese is icy and not melted enough, he places it on the ironing board and presses the iron down on it. Then his middle child Kenny complains his blanket he has named Woobie is ripped, so Jack finds a stapler and staples it.

A few nights later he starts a poker game at his house with the girls from the neighborhood using coupons instead of money for the kitty. The neighbor’s children are at the house and Jack and the girls are having fun until Caroline finally comes home. Once everyone has gone home, Caroline and Jack initiate bickering about how the house looks. Jack’s beard has become a problem too, as is the way he dresses, and the fact he has put on weight too. Jack briefly fires back in defense, only to admit he is starting to lose it a little bit.

The next day Jack is watching the Young and the Restless soap opera while drinking beer and falls asleep on the couch. He daydreams that he is part of a soap opera where Joan comes over to consummate their affair, but is quickly caught by his wife when she shows up at the house with her boss. Caroline, shoots him with a gun she kept in her purse. Jack is injured, but takes another quick drink of beer, and then falls to the floor where there is a chalk outline waiting for him. As he lays there in the chalk outline his boss Jinx shows up to scold him that he was about to call him back to work.

When he wakes up the Young and the Restless is still playing and the doorbell rings. Joan is at the door as the first guest arriving for their weekly poker game. Something awakens inside of Jack now and he tells her the poker game is off. When he closes the door, Jack decides it is time to get his act together.

Cue to the Rocky music. Jack is on the move.

First thing Jack does is shave his beard off. Once that is done he no longer lets the housework rule him, he begins to rule the housework. He becomes more productive and organized, and even starts an aerobic class for his neighborhood lady friends.

As the scenes move by we gain him standing in front of the fireplace about to ritually burn the ratty clothing that he had been wearing nearly every day for months. He looks over at Kenny and tells him it is time for him to give up his woobie. It isn’t easy to convince him, but eventually Jack succeeds in convincing him to give up the blanket crutch. Father and son grow up a little bit together and the story moves forward.

The following scene when Jack is feeling better about himself, he makes a nice romantic dinner to surprise Caroline when she gets home. Unfortunately, he doesn’t realize that she will not be home at a reasonable dinner time at all because she is working late to close the business deal. He waits for a while at the dinner table until finally giving up. He writes her a note telling her where she can find the food he made.

Jack falls asleep on the couch in the living room, and by the time she gets home he is not in the mood to argue. They are able to make up for the recent arguments they have had.

The next scene brings them to Halloween and they all want mom to be there, but she can’t be in order to earn the promotion she seeks at work. She has to go on another business trot with Mr. Richardson.

Jack doesn’t argue with her too much but reminds her that she veteran to give him this advice.

“It’s so easy to forget what’s indispensable, so don’t.”

The following scene is when Jack has dressed to meet with management about getting his job back. He hires a sitter to watch his kids, but when she shows up, he doesn’t trust her. The kids will have to go with him.

Once he gets there Jinx tries to beget him look bad to save his own job, knowing the whole time he needs Jack to get his job back to truly save his job. Jack realizes pretty quickly what is going on and points out some things to management. He likely would have gotten his job back that day if he hadn’t been too busy tending to his children in the bathroom.

Caroline is finishing up her marketing campaign for a fictional company called Scooner Tuna, that bought into her campaign slogan of America and cutting prices to help the consumer.

In 1983, there was a approved phrase used called Reaganomics.

http://www.investorwords.com/4052/Reaganomics.html

Times are different today with the new recession, but many of you reading this may remember the fears and the struggles of the American people in the early 1980’s when this movie came out. The economy is cyclical it seems, and 27 years later we are talking about the same things, even if it is different in some economic terms.

The next scene involves Jack’s lady friends tricking him into going to a male strip club after he was nice enough to pay for dinner out with them. He was a good sport about it and comes home ready to put his kids to bed. Jack’s kids want to call their mother and the neighbor that didn’t go to the strip club reminds him that it was still early enough to call her with the time zone disagreement.

Mr. Richardson by this time had no love for Jack’s wife Caroline, but for business reasons he decided he should try to woo her. He snuck into her room while she was taking a bath and was hoping for a reciprocation of the business relationship. Jack calls her room so the kids could talk to her and Mr. Richardson answers. This of course does not please Jack one bit. He loses his temper and pretty much makes it obvious to the neighbor friend that it was time to be alone.

Although the neighbor friend had promised not to breathe a word of this supposed infidelity, she of course did, to Joan no less.

Then Joan moves in for the kill while his wife catches the first flight home. Joan wants him and uses the moment to retract the opportunity. Jack is oblivious to this at first and simply says for her to make herself at home. Jack had decided to continue with his home improvement ideas and was tired, so he wanted to consume a shower.

The movie goes back to the beginning at this period in the film with the t.v. repairwoman coming wait on, along with a visit from the exterminator. It is a further sign that he has gotten himself together enough that they would be comfortable enough to do their jobs.

Jack is in the bedroom bathroom upstairs finishing shaving and getting ready to salvage inside the shower. Joan has decided to come upstairs and lay down in the bed, and when she speaks, Jack finally understands what is going on. While very tempted and clear of what could happen next, Jack looks in the mirror as the steam builds and talks himself out of doing something he would likely regret.

When Jack comes out of the bathroom he expects to see Joan there but finds Caroline there instead. They argue for a few minutes, until Jack says, “Excuse me, I have a house to accelerate.”

As Jack comes downstairs his boss Jinx has come over desperate for Jack to advance back to work. The management has realized what Jinx has done, so Jack makes a list of demands and says basically take it or leave it. Plus Jack had warned him not to talk rudely to his children the last time they met, and when Jinx does Jack fulfills his promise to punch him in the face.

At the same time Mr. Richardson comes over to try to apologize for his actions at the hotel and beg Caroline to near back to work.

In the end Jack gets his job back and Caroline will either stop at home or find a different job. Kind of like an hour and a half produced sitcom by Aaron Spelling Productions that everything eventually gets wrapped up neatly.

For me and many dads out there right now doing our best Mr. Mom impression it is never so easily wrapped up. We have the day to day, and learn along the way like Jack Butler did.

Along the way we find out why our wife was so stressed out when we finally came home from work. We end up understanding why they may have yelled at the kids to quit it. Whatever quit-it they needed to do. We ended up notion when you do the dishes and the sink is spruce it won’t be for long. We end up knowing that as many times as you pick up the toys and ask them to well-organized up after themselves, the table and floor will be messed up soon enough.

We understand what it takes to make clear they gather breakfast in the morning, get dressed, and catch on their bus on time for school. We understand knowing that we must be home when they procure off the bus and launch asking for snacks and juice boxes. And we clearly get it that not only do you have to remind them to do their homework, you have to make sure they do it, but also attend them with what they don’t understand.

Another realization sets in quickly that you then must think about what you will be feeding them for dinner, and if it is worth it to skip the dishes and budget a few bucks for takeout.

Then next comes the bath time and getting them off to bed on schedule after brushing their teeth.

This of course does not include playing referee in the many disputes siblings have throughout the day.

Finally, you know that Mr. Mom is not some temp job. Mr. Mom will wash, rinse, repeat this routine for as long as the kids are living in your home at minimum.

For me, I have always tried to be there when I got home from work.

Mr. Mom then gets why mom sometimes wanted a atomize for herself to take a jog or unbiased be alone in the bedroom when I got home. I also failed to realize sometimes that she felt the same diagram I did those times when I would get home from work and just wanted to rest and not be bothered by the day to day.

Then you hear yourself yelling and losing your patience, only to cool off and get back to constructive parenting.

Every family goes through this. Being home right now during this career transition has been an eye opener for me and has really helped me get to know my children better. We are not just parents that feed and clothe them and do sure they go to school. We get to know them, so we are not just parents. We have a relationship. We are a family.

I will get back to work. But I am grateful for this time. Even with the fatigue and frustration that the day to day brings, there is nothing I would rather do.